It’s true…it has been 5 years since I was diagnosed with cancer.  How I wish I could go back to myself 5 years ago and say that everything really will be okay, that it does get worse, way worse, but then it gets so.much.better.

When I reflect on the journey since that fateful day 5 years ago, I am in awe about how much I have changed – and changed for the better.  I love my husband, my children, and my family and friends INFINITELY more and I appreciate each and every day in a way that I think is only possible because of my diagnosis.  I am by no means great at this all the time, but strive to be better all the time because I know things could have gone a very different way.

But the most important change has occurred with my ability to trust in God.  I have learned that nothing is in my control, and that’s okay, but God is and He does a way better job of providing for me than anything I can try to do on my own.  I’m not sure if I would be able to trust Him like I do now had I not been through these last 5 years.

Although I still would love to meet cancer in a dark alley and beat the crap out of it, because it wreaks havoc in so many ways, I am thankful for the path it put me on and that I am in the place I am today because of dealing with cancer.

Thank you to everyone who has journeyed with us these last five years.  The journey is not over, and I think for anyone receiving a cancer diagnosis the journey is never over, but it does get easier.  Thank you for helping me in so many ways.

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From the moment you hear “you have cancer,” they say you are a survivor.  It is such an honor to still be a survivor.  That is why it was such a special moment for me to be in the Cancer Survivors’ Park this weekend taking pictures with my now much larger family than it was five years ago – and getting a little bit bigger come January.  It was a coincidence that our photographer picked this spot, but it was so neat to announce our fourth child in a place devoted to those who have fought cancer.

I.am.so.lucky.  Do not take a day of your good health for granted – it is a great gift and a blessing to be able to share each day with people you love.

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